There's no rush...Six months old

There's no rush

i rushed him. from the moment he became mine, i rushed him.

 i can't believe he is six months old. 

my baby is growing and changing and i can't help but reminisce about our journey thus far.

i'm feeling nostalgic again for his newness, for our first day together.  i feel desperate to slow down time. this is in stark contrast to the time he spent growing inside me. i rushed him to grow from the moment i found out i was pregnant and throughout my entire pregnancy.

i remember the pregnancy test. the moment i saw two lines. it was a kind of shock, surprise, and joy that comes from so far within you that it just overflows because it cannot possibly be contained.

only moments after finding out i was pregnant, i felt this intense need for time to speed up. the thought of 9+ months still standing between my baby and i seemed unfair. i wanted him instantly.

i anxiously waited and wished away time. i would rub my belly every night and tell him in quiet moments "hurry baby. hurry up and grow. i'm sorry to rush you, but you need to get bigger so i can hold you in my arms."

the moment he was born everything shifted. they laid him on my chest and i watched him blink his eyes heavily. he felt so perfect in my arms and i knew him instantly. i just stared at his little face and wondered how on earth i had ever gotten so lucky. i  became overwhelmingly aware that our time together was limited, that he would grow older each day, as would i. time became my enemy once again, but in the opposite way. i have not wished time away since that moment. every night as i rock him i rub my lips on his hairline of peach fuzz and whisper to him, "please slow down baby. grow slowly. there's no rush. we can stay right here."




this first six months has gone swiftly by and as i try to remember each and every day of you growing, exploring, into this big person full of excitement, life, love. we can't wait for what is to come but in the mean time...

grow slow our sweet grady, there's no rush 

love mommy & daddy <3